I Feel Re-Bourne…

Thursday, May 27th, 2010

In 2002, Team America retard Matt Damon* received a vehicle in the form of The Bourne Identity, a death and explosion packed film that served as an inspiration for the grittier direction in which James Bond has gone.

The trilogy (Identity, Supremacy and Ultimatum) centres around an amnesiac killer (Jason Bourne, hence the ‘Identity’) trying to find out who he was and what he did in his former life. This ends up leading him on a road trip with Obligatory Love Interest #1.

The film left some questions unanswered (the most important of these is who he actually was) but the ‘tard gets the girl and he seems pretty satisfied with how the whole business concluded.

Then they made another movie. (awkward cough)

I feel that it was with the second movie that the franchise went from an interesting concept (how would a killer feel if he lost his memory and learn what he did) to a generic revenge plot action movie franchise. They killed off his girlfriend early in the second installment to make the audience feel sorry for him, a known killer. This was the problem with the whole trilogy though, not just the second film.

Another thing that bugs me about the second film is the scene at the end where the CIA woman does Bourne a favour and tells him his name, birthday and where he’s from. Thereby robbing the audience of any reason to see the third fucking movie!

The last movie (not that you’d know it from the dvds, I had to guess), The Bourne Ultimatum, depends yet again on our villain protagonist being targeted by the EVIL GOVERNMENT while he doesn’t want to hurt anybody and live a normal life. Well, tough. I’ve said it once and I’ll say it again, I have no idea why execs expect audiences to sympathise with killers as protagonists!

While the Bourne movies were a reasonably entertaining way to spend an afternoon, they’re nothing special. Any of them beyond the first is just a generic action movie and the third one, as I’ve established, was entirely pointless. You would be better off (although not by much) watching Casino Royale or any of the preceding Bond movies (but not Quantum of Solace). Overall, if you have to watch any of them, the first one is the best way to go, don’t bother with the other two.

I’ve put The Bourne Identity in highlight-able text here: His real name is David Webb, no relation to Robert Webb. SPOILER ALERT!!



One comment on “I Feel Re-Bourne…

  1. James M says:

    Have you read the books? Far better than the films in my opinion.

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